That's right boys and girls.....I've been given a loaded keyboard and a burning drive to sit on my ass. Plus, I needed to find an outlet for my mad typing skills. My 10th grade typing teacher would be beaming right now if she knew that after an uber cup of coffee, 2 Ritalin and some kind of vitamin that has added caffiene (for weight maintenance) my fingers are flying across the keys and about eleventy words a minute. Only minor errors....I'm marrying spell check in my next life.
For anyone who is offended by the premier title I do apologize....but only a little. Maybe it harkens back to the days before the novelty of saying "bad words" had worn off....not sure.....anyway, it's a line from a song and for some reason when a song, catchy or not contains the word Goddamn it gets stuck in my head. Forever. Period.
You have The Pink Mountaintops to thank for the next title.
Ok....a few important things for you to know....a FYI if you will.
- My punctuation is atrocious. I don't care. If I get famous I'll get an editor or pay for grammar check or something. Until that day comes it's best to accept and move on.
- I dig the hell out of ....... It's how I roll. Ideal for a pause or thought break. Like it or don't.
- I will make all possible efforts to use these words correctly.... Your and Their Your, yours, you're Their, there, they're Pay attention.....there may or may not be a quiz.
- I am known to type in caps for emphasis....in essence, if I'm in caps....I'm screaming.
- ****Parental Discression Advised Here People*****
- Fuck is my all time favortie curse word. I use it as most people use salt. Beware.
- This is a grown up blog....if you're (note the correct gramatical useage of you're there) under the age of 20 go listen to your Boys like Girls MP3's and play on Myspace. YOU. GO. NOW.
- I am a happy person....mostly. There are just lots of things that get on my last fucking nerve....You, o gentle reader get to reap the benefits.
- First and foremost.....I LOVE THE SHIT out of my husband and children and family.....mostly immediate family such as: parents, in-laws, aunts, uncles and cousins. Any "kin" farther out than that I only see at funerals or some shit and they DO NOT count.
- Because I LOVE THE SHIT out of my people I feel no shame in blogging about them. I wouldn't say anything on here I wouldn't or haven't already said to their faces (once again, check out the proper use of their). They know I'm high strung.....they love me IN SPITE of it!! Hella swell people....I highly recommend getting some.....oh wait....they're MINE! HAHAHAHAHAHA guess it kinda sucks to be you.
- I love a good suggestion.....I am also quite fond of playing devil's advocate....just ask my dear mother. Anything you'd like to hear my opinion on? Let me know. My opinion is ALWAYS free....not necessarily wanted....but it is one of the few things in this economy you can get for nothing! Now, if I could only find a way to turn my hot air into a petroleum product.
So....without further ado......(insert sound of dramatic drum roll) here is the inaugural post.
SLUG REVOLT
In the words of The Mother Slug:
Enjoy....or don't.
Shit. It's lunchtime and the wee slugs need some Chef B. and Capri Sun.
**Because I'm a choosy mom I choose Capri Sun Roaring Waters....no sugar and the kids think they're getting something special because it comes in a damn pouch with a straw. In actuality...it's just another dish I don't have to wash. YES, we do recycle the pouches....as many of those damn things as we go through we could build a Yurt. Get a dictionary...it's a real word. I choose JIF too.**
Random thought for the day: Silk Soy Milk ain't half bad.
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